Talk on "leadership"

 

This talk was given at a women's leadership training event.

The BYU commencement address from 12/14/07 was used as inspiration

In the business world the term servant leader is used and refers to someone who serves as opposed to simply being in front and leading.  In scouting there is a phrase, rocking chair scoutmaster.  this is a type of leadership that allows the scout to lead and the adult to guide.  In this address it refers to a disciple-leader who ministers and serves.  someone who is called to lead as Christ leads.  The kind of leader that builds, lifts and inspires through love and devotion.  I believe this type of leader takes the servant leader and the rocking chair scoutmaster to a whole new level.  This is the kind of leader we should strive to be.

The Savior and his life are perfect examples.  This address breaks this down in to three principles:  example, vision and love.  I'm going to focus on example.  We have all heard the phrase do as I say, not what I do.  This is not reality.  One of the important leaders do is what they do.  Your actions speak louder than your words ever could.   Children will learn from your example eventually.  In adults there is something called herd mentality that kicks in.  

We as humans tend to be followers.  I tested this theory once.  We had been evacuated from a party at a hotel and it was cold.  So, I discussed this with my small group of six people.  we discussed a direction to walk in and took off with a purpose.  To our suprise all 150 people followed.  As we were walking, "ok now what;  where do we lead them?"  I'm not going to finish that story but we had a great time.

Often we get called as leaders and we kind of have that feeling, ok now what?  Where are we going and where will I lead them.  I've been struck with some very bad health and I've been laying around my house convalescing.  I've lost some of my endurance and last weekend our scout troop went camping and needed a female leader.  I could have easily said no.  Plus it was cold, windy and rainy.  I wanted to lead and support so I just said yes.  I just so happens I was the only person going who had ever been to this location.  I am also the only who had been on the two mile hike uphill both ways.  There was no map and I am in no shape to lead a hike, but I chose to go.  I usually brought up the rear, but when it came time to choose left or right on the path my troop would stop and wait and I would get to the front and lead them down the correct path.  The second half is up a road.  Serveral times I wanted to quit and have them drive back and get me.  I huffed and puffed and sweated until all my clothes were wet.  Coming around one of the last bends in the road, one of the scouts had sat down.  Her feet hurt.  I who had struggled, told her come on, we can do this together.  She and I finished together.

Why am I telling you this?  Sometimes we are called to lead feeling inept and incapable, not worthy, but often we have a particular skill or knowledge that is needed at that time.  Even the Marines were following me on that hike.  just because you are struggling doesn't mean you can lead by example and drive that struggle bus down the correct path.  Our example is who we are at our core.  

You teach your children and sometimes the children of others, and the most important thing to teach is to obey the commandments of God by keeping the commandments of God.  It is important to talk with them and tell them what you are doing and why, but it is in the doing that there is real power to shape their lives.  If you want to teach them to love the temple, then go to the temple and put pictures of the temple in your home.  Have lessons and discuss it's importance.  In this and in everything you do be a living model of what you want others to be.  People today need good examples to follow.

Christ sets the best example and the best way to lead we read John 8 1-11. 

 1 Jesus went unto the mount of Olives.2 And early in the morning he came again into the ^atemple, and all the people came unto him; and he sat down, and taught them.3 And the scribes and Pharisees brought unto him a ^awoman taken in ^badultery; and when they had set her in the midst,4 They say unto him, Master, this woman was taken in adultery, in the very act.5 Now Moses in the ^alaw commanded us, that such should be stoned: but what sayest thou?6 This they said, tempting him, that they might have to accuse him. But Jesus stooped down, and with his finger ^awrote on the ground, as though he heard them not.7 So when they continued asking him, he lifted up himself, and said unto them, He that is without ^asin among you, let him ^bfirst cast a ^cstone at her.8 And again he stooped down, and wrote on the ground.9 And they which heard it, being convicted by their own ^aconscience, went out one by one, beginning at the eldest, even unto the last: and Jesus was left alone, and the woman standing in the midst.10 When Jesus had lifted up himself, and saw none but the woman, he said unto her, Woman, where are those thine accusers? hath no man condemned thee?11 She said, No man, Lord. And Jesus said unto her, Neither do I ^acondemn thee: go, and ^bsin no ^cmore.

First off this is a great example of forgiveness and how we should not judge others.  Next it is an excellent example of his leadership style.  He did not get hysterical and start throwing stones.  He also didn't cut them off and start telling them how wrong they were.  He also didn't take her aside and talk bad about the accusers.  What he did do is take his time in responding.  He then flipped the script and gave permission for those without sin to stone her.  The accusers left one by one.  When the two were alone he did a snarky thing.  He said, "where are the accusers; hath no man condemned thee?"   She said know, and he replied I don't either.  Go and sin no more.  He led with a calmness and a forgiveness we would all do well to model.

I often ask myself as Primary President what kind of example am I setting.  What can of leader am I?  How can I do the most good and be effective in my area?  I often feel like the Stake Primary Presidency might be the most insignificant calling in the church.  I plan no events other than part of this one and I work with zero youth.  How can I make a difference?  The only thing I can do is be an example.  The example I'm trying to set is, It's ok not to be perfect but keep trying.  You are not alone and I love you no matter where you are on your path.  In my calling I do get to visit you sisters and I hope I make you feel supported and loved.  

Another great quality and way to show a good example is to respect yourself.  Respect your time, body, and opinions.  Showing self respect both teaches others to respect you, and to also respect yourselves.  Often as women we can be made to feel as we are less.  Or sometimes the opposite as if we are all that matters.  Find balance.  Find your worth and the worth of others.  Show others with your example how to do that.  I love Wonder woman;  girl power all the way.  But Thor is also pretty great too.  Every day ask yourself, and maybe write in your journal, what kind of example did I set today.  What kind of example do I want to show today?  Am I emulating Christ in my actions.